Thank God for First Ladies

Finally! A first lady our nation can be really proud of as a model of a self-accomplished, strong backboned, mother. I’m talking about Jenny Sanford.

I am a political junkie of sorts, and I have to admit that the crazy escapades of South Carolina’s Governor Sanford, the transnational cheat who not only betrayed his wife and family but also his staff and ultimately his state when he left South Carolina to visit his Argentinean paramour without properly giving notice of his travels, is the sort of stuff that has me glued to CNN. As a news story, it was better than Spitzer, McGreevey, and Edwards all rolled into one. For the life of me, I cannot understand how so many accomplished men, men who are not only keenly aware of the spotlight on them, but in fact very deliberately chose to step right into it, cannot keep their pants zipped – at least for the 4 years, 8 years, or whatever their length of service in high public office. But what has roiled me equally are their wives who stand by them at press conferences, but don’t stand up for themselves and ultimately send the message to their children that saving their father’s public face is more important than their mother’s own personal dignity. Now, I’ll cut Elizabeth Edwards a major break. She is understandably in literal survivor mode. But the rest of them just make me lose faith in my fellow woman.

And then in walks Jenny Sanford. She was a Wall Street executive before working too hard to get her husband elected. She and her husband have four young boys, and when she learned of her husband’s infidelity five months ago, she first tried to work on forgiveness and to save her marriage. But she now says, “We reached a point where I felt it was important to look my sons in the eyes and maintain my dignity, self-respect, and my basic sense of right and wrong. I therefore asked my husband to leave two weeks ago.” She did not stand by his side as he gave an emotional press conference. And she has said, "His career is not a concern of mine. He's going to have to worry about that. I'm worried about my family and the character of my children." She said that she hopes to be able to save the marriage, but that ultimately she will be fine with or without her husband. Marriages are complicated and parenthood makes it even more so. And while no one can say whether these scorned political wives should ditch their husbands or try to keep their marriages alive, we can all respect a woman who understands that maintaining her own dignity and standing up for herself in the public eye sends an important message to her own children and to mothers everywhere.

Kudos Jenny Sanford.

-- New Mom