NewMom: My Office Away From the Office
I have an office away from the office, and it’s not at home. It’s the waiting room in Suite 4B of a medical building downtown. My equipment consists only of a blackberry, and on rare occasion, a cell phone. And, quite frankly, the whole set-up embarrasses me.
Why can’t I just take the hour or two I need for a doctor’s appointment and consider it off limits to work? I have no problem doing that when I go home at night or on the weekends. I work in a place where everyone would understand, and no one would begrudge me the time. Frankly, I don’t think any of them would even notice if I waited until I was back at my desk before I responded to their e-mail.
But I’ve been going to the doctor once a week for several months now, and that will be ratcheting up to twice a week starting Monday. I have all the flexibility in the world to make and go to appointments whenever I need them with no consequence at work. My boss, my team, and my colleagues are all completely understanding.
I know thousands of women struggle without those freedoms from work, and I am proud to have a job and an employer that allow me the latitude I need. Why then can’t I let go and relax?
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5 comments:
For me (I do the same thing) I think it's because my employer is flexible that I feel the need to be "on call" when I'm out of the office for a personal appointment, and because I use "work time" to handle mommy duties (childcare issues, scheduling doctor's appointments.) The really rotten part of it all is that it always seems to be my personal time that is sacrificed.
I work 2 days per week in the office and 3 days per week at home with my 5 month old. (We'll see how long this can continue once my little one is crawling and walking!) But...for now, it is a wonderful set up. However, I feel a very similar urge to work all of the time. My company allowed me to work from home and I am quite sure they expect me to use my "flex-time" option quite liberally in this situation. I feel guilty when I step away from the computer/phone to do a diaper change, feeding time, play time, ect. I have voice mail and nothing is an "emergency" with my job, so why do I feel guilty? I think it is just my work ethic. I am a devoted/loyal worker and I do not want anyone to think otherwise. Honestly, I do not want my attitude to change. I want to continue to feel a little bit of quilt when I am "on company time" doing personal things. I think it will help me stay focused. It is so easy to become distracted when pregnant/and then when a mommy, so I think the internal "guilt" will help keep me on my toes and a good worker. I think your feelings are perfectly normal and I am sure they are benefiting your company in more ways you even know.
get rid of the gadgets Sis because having them is setting you up to become the property of your employer 24/7 due to too much availability through far-reaching communications technology. If you think I'm kidding, taka a look at you now and compare it to when you were a kid. If you're not over 40 then look at Mom and Dad's relatively simple life. We are buying into a not so convenient Very Large Array of conveniences. No one is suggesting you thrown the stuff into the lake on your next camping trip, but try taking out the batteries and temporarily misplacing them for awhile. Then do an honest comparison. My ousted my tv set many years ago and I am a much happier person for it. This stuff is absolutely addictive. If you don't think so then I would like to politely challenge you to do without it for a while and put yourself in a place where you can honestly take it or leave it. As far as the guilt thing is concerned; while guilt has an enormously pertinent purpose in our souls and does help us to keep on track, I would also like to assert that there is such a thing as false guilt. I can support this by saying that there are times when we feel guilty but are not actually guilty (like when little johnny tells you that you never let him do anything HE wants to do and that you are a mean mommy because you took the ball away from him after he broke the chandelier with it, etc. There are times we are guilty and we don't feel a thing. When was the last time you felt guilty about calling your child a kid. Sounds innocent enough, but the word sescribes a young goat. How would you feel about calling your child a goat?
We need to concentrate on getting the guilt thing right. I would assert that the most effective way to that is to be able to ask yourself the key question: Am I really guilty or not? (of course it helps if you believe in a God that has true authority and can speak to you through your conscience.) My best guess is that Love is the standard to go by. I love my job. I work with little people and I enjoy their company but I need to go home and let them leave my thoughts at the end of the day. I find myself having to turn them off when I am home so that I can devote myself to the things at hand. I sometimes just have to purposely and objectively prioritize. I sometimes fail miserably and chalk it up to being human. We all have that right. Hope this helps.
I kind of like having my blackberry for the doctor's office. I hate the feeling of wasted time while I sit and wait -- and we all know how long we get stuck waiting at the doctor's office! Being able to read things for work and still communicate while I'm sitting in a waiting room means that I can get things done and still get home on time - even when I have to be away from the office during work hours.
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