ModernMom: In Boston, the Rain, Rain Won’t Go Away

Maybe you’ve heard that in Boston, we’ve just had the rainiest June on record since 1903. And the first few days of July have not shown any improvement. I simply can’t look at the pool as half full right now. All I want to do is rant, so here it goes:

1. At first we made the best of it. We built forts, baked cookies, visited the local museums. Now we are simply stir crazy. Our new play structure is teasing us through the misty windows; our hammock looks like it will take three years to dry out.
2. My son asked me this morning why the clouds haven’t stopped crying.
3. I used to live in Seattle. If I wanted grey skies and frizzy hair every day I would have stayed.
4. I am tired of my friends in other parts of the country complaining about the heat. I would rather be looking for ways to escape the heat than trying to come up with yet another rainy-day activity.
5. My kids are going to grow out of their bathing suits before they’ve even had a chance to wear them.
6. We were going to camp out in our backyard, make s’mores, and explore local hiking trails this weekend. Instead, we will probably be making forts, baking cookies, and exploring local museums…again and again.

So please, please, if you have any ideas of how we can brighten our spirits that have become so very dampened, let me know!

CommuterMom: What’s in a Name

We had a rare afternoon of sunshine last week which meant that our neighborhood was busy with kids out riding bikes and enjoying the weather. One of my neighbors, who I think I have spoken to only three times ever, was out walking with her 2-year old daughter. She stopped by to say hello, and our daughters played with sidewalk chalk while we had a brief conversation. When it was time for them to continue on their walk she said to her daughter, “Give the chalk back to Auntie.” Auntie?!? Are we related? In all honesty, I’m not even sure I know this woman’s name!

Yesterday I was out with my co-worker and both of our kids. When speaking to her son she used “Mrs.” when she referred to me. Mrs?!?! It sounded so formal – especially for our casual outing.

This got me to thinking about the way children address adults these days. I don’t think I have used anything but first names when talking to my daughter about adults. She calls her teachers, all of our neighbors, my college friends and the parents of her friends at school all by their first names – unless she refers to them as Jane’s Mom or Eric’s Mom…literally. I suppose “Auntie” is an attempt at calling me something more personal, but I tend to feel it’s a name that should be reserved for just that, Aunties.

I want my daughter to “respect her elders” but I’d like to think that has more to do with behavior rather than names or titles alone. Can’t she still be respectful even if she calls them Paul and Lori?

CraftyMom: Making Thumbprint Cats…From the Everything Old is New Again File

When I was a little girl, I was obsessed with rubber stamps. We lived a few hours south of Boston but we did a day trip at least once a year and I loved going to Faneuil Hall because I could buy stamps at Ink-a-Dink-a-Doo. Sadly, it no longer exists but I have vivid memories of bringing home my new stamps and ink pads (usually purple or the ultra-cool rainbow pad).

Of course, as soon as I thought my oldest daughter was ready, I bought a stamp pad in every color imaginable, all sorts of stamps with images I thought she would like and….total dud. She was bored in 10 minutes...OK, more like 2 seconds! So like any bored kid, she started sticking her hands in the ink and in a flash I remember good old Ed Emberley.

I loved making the thumbprint pictures made famous in his 1977 book. I could not get to the bookstore fast enough. We bought Ed Emberley’s Great Thumbprint Drawing Book and what a success! The book is exactly as I remembered it with crystal clear directions on how to go from thumbprint to any number of insects and animals. She loves doing these and loves that she can make it look just like the picture in the book. I totally know how she feels!

NewMom: New Battleground: Parents v. Non-Parents

A new study was released at this month’s World at Work Conference revealing that mothers are less likely to be hired and more likely to earn less for the same job than their equally qualified female counterparts. (Interestingly, they found, the inverse to be true for fathers v. other men.)

I’m not sure what to make of it. I can’t say I’m shocked, but I also can’t say I’ve known anyone to face that particular bias. I am working for the same employer, in the same role now as I was before I had children. While I could be underpaid (and let’s face it, aren’t we all), I’m confident it has nothing to do with my parental status. But what bothered me even more than the study’s results was the bitter venom between moms and non-moms in the comments posted to BusinessWeek’s blog entry about the study.

To summarize, apparently there are an awful lot of women without children who think their parent-counterparts get away with luxurious hours off from work to attend their children’s every little whim. At the same time, there are a lot of moms who seem to feel that every “childless by choice” working woman is a cold, heartless, unattractive, fill-in-the-blank. Admittedly, that may be a bit of hyperbole, but what is clear is that there is a new battleground of bias in the workplace and parenthood, motherhood in particular, is smack in the middle of the fight. I suppose in some ways this is a natural sociological evolution in the overall movement for gender equity, but that’s exactly why it leaves me wanting to shout out to all women, moms and non-moms alike, “Can’t we all just get along?” Men have “Bands of Brothers.” Why does it seem like women have so much more trouble finding common ground, allegiance, and support.